But maybe...hopefully...you are lucky enough to know someone who ...regardless of his car engine, his 9-5, his wife's fitness and (let's face it) makeup routine, and his kids' grades and triumphs on the field/track/court...struggles. Someone who hurts. Someone who knows sadness. Yet...even in the midst of sorrow...suffering...uncertainty...angst...he is happy. I mean really happy. Content. Not complacent. That's entirely different. But accepting of where God has placed him and faithfully willing to actively take part as the story unfolds. He can honestly sit in the light and take it in...without judgement...without guilt...without self indulgence. He can just be present in the moment.
I hope you know this person.
I hope so, because if you do, maybe you can join me in at least considering the idea that maybe we can choose happy.
Maybe...
Before I continue, let me first point out that this is not to discount the very real conditions of depression and anxiety which overwhelm and drag their victims down terribly dark paths. These conditions are legitimate and those who suffer benefit extensively from psychiatric attention.
Accepting and excepting the exceptions...
Maybe happy can be the "more" we seek. Maybe it can be the more we DEMAND.
I find that the more happy I demand, the more I encounter. Perhaps it is in my definition of happy. Because to me, happy is not a future thing to attain, it's a now thing to experience. It isn't, "I'll be happy when..." Because let's face it, I'm not promised whatever moment I've committed to whatever comes after the ellipses. Oh and let's not ignore the genius simplicity of the argument that tomorrow never comes...even my predictive text knew that phrase.
Demanding more happy has nothing to do with going into your boss's office and negotiating a raise. It has nothing to do with what you drive. Nothing to do with what your spouse looks like or how well mannered your kids are. ...although all of those things can be legitimately bright points in your day.
By demand...I really mean seek...intentionally. Demanding more happy actually requires you to demand more of yourself. To dig deeper. To appreciate more. To look at your gifts through the eyes of your Creator and see them as nothing less than purely amazing and worthy of celebration.
Have you ever bought your child a candy bar? You KNEW he'd be so happy. You came home and...
You: "Guess what I got you!"
Kid: (with absolute enthusiasm). Legos!
You: well, no but...
Kid: (excited) A dinosaur?!
You: well, no but...
Kid: (vibrating in place) then what?!?!
You: (with absolute enthusiasm) This candy bar!
Kid: (clearly underwhelmed) oh...yeah...cool...thanks mom
Have you been there? It's deflating at best, right?
And yet...do we not do that to the creator of the universe each and every time we fail to recognize His blessings? Has He gifted you with this day? With your paycheck? With the fact that your car started this morning...the clean water you just drank...the near miss on the freeway when you called that other driver an idiot (among other things)...what about the lady with a full cart who let you go ahead in the check out line because your kid was screaming (...for a candy bar...), or the fact that your boss completely overlooked the fact that your report was a day late...?
Do we not recognize these as blessings.? Or are blessings only the big things? And if we do identify these as blessings, are they not worth celebrating? Are we underwhelmed?
The truth is, the more happy you discover, the more you will demand, and the more you demand the more happy you discover.
One of my favorite 90s bands was Sister Hazel...laugh it up...but once you recover, read the lyrics here, as I close. Because I think they were on to something (and perhaps ON something but that's beside the point...). Enjoy...
"If you want to be somebody else,
If you're tired of fighting battles with yourself
If you want to be somebody else
Change your mind...
Hey hey-
Have you ever danced in the rain
Or thanked the sun
Just for shining- just for shining
Over the sea?
Oh no- take it all in
The world's a show
And yeah, you look much better,
Look much better when you glow."
